If You’re Not Changing…You Don’t Want It Enough

Change Is Possible, Not Easy

Commercials on TV tell you all the time that you can change yourself. In thirty seconds, the commercial actors can get smarter, thinner, prettier, richer. But this fantasy world only sets us up for a fall.

We hear about the possibilities for wonderful changes people can make in their lives, and we want to duplicate those results. When we try and are not quickly regarded, we actually wind up feeling worse than we did before we started.

The problem is, of course, that change is possible, but it does not come immediately. Nobody want to sell us a program for change that will take years because of course no one would buy it. But it does take years to accomplish the most important changes.

When you entered the first grade, you didn’t expect to learn a second language, algebra, and the history of the War of 1812 all in the first week. You began an education that took more than a decade and provided you with incredible positive change.

Positive change in your life will not be finished today, but it can start today.

The decision to make a change offers wonderful feelings of control and optimism, but those are short-lived if the change is not accomplished. Repeated efforts at self-change, characterized by an expectation of an unrealistically high payoff in an unrealistically short time, actually reduce satisfaction with our lives by 40%. Polivy and Herman 2000.”

[From 100 Simple Secrets Series]

My Take:

Arright, forreally tho, here’s my take. If you’re not making changes, you don’t want it enough. And that’s what it comes down to. Whether it’s a relationship, and you’re not putting in enough effort and saying “I don’t have time” or “I live to far” or making other excuses, it comes down to, you don’t feel it’s worth it enough (& if this is the case, you need to either rethink it or let it go so you’re not being selfish!) Anyone can say “I don’t have time”. Who has time? No one has time. You have to MAKE time for things you care about. If you want to attend college, what’s holding you back? If you can go out and party until 3 am and drink all night, and go to work the next day, there’s no reason you cannot study at night to work towards your degree. 10 years time passes fast. Everyone does things differently, but from what I’ve gotten from a number of different people, is “Time flies.” You have all these plans to do something, and you don’t realize the time is gone and you find yourself with more serious commitments and “not the time”.

School is just an example. So if you got all these excuses, it’s because you don’t want it enough. I’ve seen people from both sides of the spectrum. Those who worked their booty off to pay for school/avoid loans, finish their degree, and work a little harder and pull through to find a career. Then, they saved up a little money, and pursued their dreams. Others I know who have just a high school education. My good friends, and good people, but I’ve watched and seen the same excuses play over and over…”I’m going back to school…” “Next semester…” “I have to work…it’s work or school…” and then the time passes and they realize “It’s too late” (although it never is…it might just be harder at a later point in life). These are some of the people who have told me get done with all of your schooling young so you can move to bigger and better things in later life 🙂 Great advice!

If you have goals that you want to achieve, whether it be eating healthy, attending school, starting a business, etc., start making changes now. Make the COMMITMENT now and start making changes ASAP! Time management is key…remember, anything is possible…if you want it enough.

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“Cheap Bling Is Bad News”

After picking up a healthy living newsletter from a local health & fitness club, I was amazed about some of the findings. Among them, news on “cheap bling”.

Here’s what the article in Natural Awakenings (Aug 2012) has to say about the issue:

“Research from the Ecology Center, a nonprofit environmental organization, discloses that more than half of low-cost metal adult and children’s jewelry contains large amounts of toxic chemicals, including lead, cadmium, nickel, chromium, and chlorine (from polyvinyl chloride, or PVC). The report notes that these chemicals have been linked in animal and some human studies to acute allergies and long-term health impacts such as birth defects, impaired learning, liver toxicity, and cancer. According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, young children should not be given or allowed to play with cheap metal jewelry, especially when unsupervised.”

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This may be a reason to opt for quality over quantity; be careful about your purchases. Cheaper is not always better, especially knowing this. I remember my younger cousin used to get allergies from nickel-based belts, earrings, necklaces, etc. from stores that we commonly see at U.S. malls. I am not sure I can directly mention which stores are crimes of these types of products, but I am sure you (especially the ladies!) can imagine which ones…you may end up having side effects that SEAL the deal for FOREVER health problems…I know that was a little cheesy but you get what I mean 🙂

Keep in mind, your skin, the largest organ of your body, ABSORBS chemicals, lotions, etc. through its pores. If you wear something all day long, and it has some chemical which is able to pass through your pores, washing your skin with soap is not going to help you. It’s already in your body.

Female Feticide

The Truth: Females are deprived of life

In 3rd world countries such as India, the male to female ratio is a critical issue. Females are viewed as second-rate citizens and are looked down upon. Last year, more than 200 girls were given the opportunity to rename themselves whose names meant “unwanted” in Hindi. Imagine that. Your own family calling you unwanted from the day you are born. What would this do to your self confidence? How depressing is that! Countless females live with this dilemma each day of their lives.

To many Indians, in both the poverty-stricken and affluent communities, a son is similar to a godsend. It’s comparable to a secure retirement plan, while daughters require a dowry (illegal, yet not enforced in India). During my trip to India, I was planning on visiting the Unique  Home for Girls in Jalandhar to set up a volunteering opportunity for CSU’s. Unfortunately, due to a family emergency I had to return to the States in just 5 days. I plan on making arrangements for this and a documentary to awareness on my next trip (stay tuned…)

However, while I was there, I noticed — boys and men. EVERYWHERE. Not too many girls, even in and around the shops! Punjab has one of the worst male to female ratios, with some entire villages consisting of only men. Even when we visited shops, clothing shops, or any kind, men were working. Herds and flocks of men constantly staring, with no hesitation–even if you looked completely scrub in sweats with Oreos stuck in your teeth! It was quite disturbing.

Here are some quick facts about the issue (Reference: Nimerta Sandhu, UC Berkeley, CA):

-Since 1980, an estimated 40 million women are ‘missing,’ by way of abortion, neglect or murder. 7,000 female fetuses are aborted every day according to the U.N.–solely because they are girls. One dowry death is reported every 77 minutes. Countless others are never known.

-As per the latest Census in the year 2011, the total female sex ratio in India is 940 per 1000 males. Varying among states in India, some go as low as barely over 600.

-Examining the sex ratios at birth of second child makes it evident that son preference is affecting family-building strategies. The sex ratio of last births (number of females born per 1,000 males when the first child is a female ) ranges from a low of 504 in Punjab, to 540 in Haryana, and 572 in Himachal. –> Why? The expected duty of an Indian wife is to be respectful and obedient. Life of a girl compared to the life of a boy is dramatically different.

-Girls are often held back and do not have a chance to prove themselves. Often, girls are not given credit for their achievements while a male achieving less academically may be praised more than a girl. Boys are not punished as badly in some families.

-Having more access to cheaper technology, e.g. ultrasound machines, is making it easier abort female fetuses — especially in wealthier communities where they are able to spend more money on medical procedures.

-Some quotes:

“She was thrown in the garbage dump outside the village for dogs that ate her. Her only fault — she was the fourth girl born in a poor family,” said Harshinder Kaur, pediatric doctor here, recalling the first time she witnessed discrimination against female infants in Punjab’s rural side. “Over a decade ago, I couldn’t save that infant and ever since I try to speak for the girls who never lived,” said Dr. Kaur.

*I do not own this image*

“While in India, one of our old family friends visited us at home. This is, by all means, an elite family with a lot of money and influence. As all conversations with Indians, this one also turned about us not having children. For one they (OK most of them) just can’t comprehend the idea of one’s choice to not to have any children, but this lady took it one step further. She suggested to my wife that she could give her a pill to ensure that we would only have a son since my only brother has two daughters. But this isn’t even the best part…. get ready for this…..she said this in front of her daughter who is my age and even better yet, also in front of her teenage granddaughter!!! Don’t ask me I’m also as dumbfounded as you are. This was one of those situations when I didn’t know how to even answer to her, where would I even begin while I was still trying to figure at how many levels she was offensive. But to her, she was probably just trying to help or something.”_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Women and the environment are the essence of our existence. It is our responsibility to assure both are protected and healthy, therefore, we must raise awareness, make the right decisions, and help other make the right decisions — EDUCATE each other!

Solutions:

(Nimerta Sandhu)

-Spread Awareness

-Support women

-Celebrate a daughter’s birth

-Don’t give dowry

Find out how you can help and make a difference!

Here are some external links/videos you can check out if you are interested!

http://abcnews.go.com/2020/video/indiasdeadlysecretestimated-40-milliongirlshavegonemissingindia-2020-15126835

http://www.thenational.ae/news/world/southasia/technologyaffluenceappeartoincreasefemalefoeticideinindia?pageCount=0

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2011/06/21/genderselectionabortioncrisisinasiaindiaus.html


Nimerta Sandhu’s Sources:

http://mediastorm.com/publication/undesired
http://www.mapsofindia.com/census2011/female-sex-ratio.html
http://www.thehindu.com/news/national/article398285.ece
http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/female-feticide